Dear Ninni

Such a long time...very very long time i have written anything to you. Whats App and facebook takes up most of my time and switching on the laptop seems a herculean task which i dare to perform rarely. I do read a lot of mommy stuff and get overwhelmed by the likes flooding underneath and then ponder about my mediocrity and convince myself i have nothing better to write. Does that sound demeaning... mediocrity is something i am blessed with.

But for you i am the mammu. The chubby cuddly mammu  in fact you cuddle me more than i do and needless to say that is because of the oodles of weight i have put on over the years !!! Six and a half years since the day you were born and here is the lovely girl simple at heart... yes sentimental and on the verge of a tear at any harsh word...you are so unlike me. You do not excel in class, you do just about all right and the interesting part you are cool about it and gradually so are we... me and your father. For me i had to do well in exams, not downright competitive but the urge from your grandpa ( my father) i had to go on... i did not push myself but more or less studied sincerely ( i know it sounds out rightly boring) and that,s why i love the playfulness, mischief and fun you exude. The simplicity and innocence sometimes scares your father.. how you would survive in this world. You are soft spoken and have a sweet voice but the world yearns for firm, loud voices . No i am not worried at all i love your wit, one liners and feel a real hero when you giggle at the silly jokes i make.

You are learning to read and i know how happy i am!! No you don,t take a book and finish it off but you have just begun to and i hope one day books will draw you to them and even if they don,t it,s fine i guess. Ninni it is okay when we try to give the best to the child... like my father has given me but then at the same time to stand and stare at the unique marvel we have brought in this world and let her be is equally as important. This is parenting darling... a tight rope walk. My guilt saga continues, i sneak out to movies, parlours and come home guilty and the guilt isn,t out of habit but to be with you....laugh, play and teach... accompany you to your classes, getting your favourite momos , buying the ice cream you love all are special moments i long for.

Your presence, chatter echoes through the house... and sometimes in absence of your father me and your Pishi ( i never call her maid) we have this special bonding, gorging on junk food , visiting malls and giggling silly. We exchange glances when you hide your face in palms watching some scene of My Little Pony ( romantic may be) and roll into laughter. We listen to your school stories where you change your best friend every week. More than you i get worried why don,t you have a best friend... would you be like me a loner!! Na i am not a loner but not very much main stream as well. You are a warm friendly person ( most of the times) and i just don,t want to see you lonely. But this is a tough world isn,t it Ninni and friends don,t last here. I have to relax and let you be.

I don,t know if all these would make sense if you ever read this anyday!!

Only darling... we gave you lots of love, pampering and care when you grew up. And like your mammu whenever i dream... whatever i dream of... the house would always be my old one where i had grown up and left since many years...it is such a imprint Ninni which i can never erase ... you too when you think of childhood the love and the images and the fragrances fill your heart and brings a smile in your lips.

Lots and lots of love
Yours Ma

The world at five...

Dear Ninni

You are five !! Invariably this day, along with the rush of any small party we plan for you...i will recall once the hospital and the doctor carrying a wailing you and put you in the bewildered arms of your father as i stared numbly.

Well those are bygone days and here we are two proud parents five years hence, still marvelling we did it like all, raise you and still on the job...and almost complacent with it.

You show every sign of a spoiled genY kid who is being spoiled more by your parents and Pishi ,who is still being fed hours watching ridiculous tv shows and still being waken with a milk bottle on bed, who would sleep after midnight, being dragged to school in morning and who would extend her afternoon nap to eight in the evening!!! Sounds bad ,don't worry you have a mom as disorganized and as unruly as can be...yes nothing to be proud of and by now you would have discovered too!! And regarding food you area fussy eater in the form of your father...to whom i  attribute all things i don't like about you!

And whom i'd attribute this innocence and softness and all the sweet mischiefs in the world...the completeness and absolute new perspective you give to our lives!! There is a pure heart and soul still unscathed, flawless...how do we save it...or can we...and this love trust and the absolute helplessness when your parents fight...just makes me wish to live long and be there for you... This is what i guess something no respite from...from someone with wings and dreams unlimited and all attachment clipped...here,s a mom tethered to the love you shower, some extent domesticated..there's always someone who draws me home like gravity...someone whose soft voice fills my heart as i leave home, someone who has just begun to love her story books after my disappointment that she won't ever read...someone who has remarkable patience as she paints with intricate detailing, someone who would make designs with clay as her mother can never imagine...someone who with her father would finish all school craft work with a creativity which makes me just...speechless.

Well well like all moms i exaggerate too...that's ok..i guess. There's a lovely heart which knows how to love...the love you show to your pishi and all others...and a happiness you evoke to all around you.... Ninni i know you will be a successful woman...and our success does not lie in that....it lies in the fact that this wonderful soul we brought to the world does not wither by any stupidity shown by either of her parents....only this much and we have a beautiful smart woman who would continue to make us proud...and make me wish to live and live long.


Love...and lots of love
Yours Ma

Confessions

Dear Ninni

Some confession time. It's an age old debate in the country we live in. I do not know how people deal  with it in other countries and whether such debates do exist. Well i had always been a working mom (whoever has coined the term with such acute connotations) and truly i do not know much other way of life, somehow i always knew i had to work... it wasn't ambitions or aspirations just a plain principle of working and living my own life. Well things aren't so plain really...

First of all i don't really know i need to confess this but succumbing to spousal and parental pressures let me tell you i am not a conventional mom!! Yes me too am not sure of what that means but i am not obsessed with your school, studies, progress, food like the most moms i know and yes i do have a nice world of my own which supposedly i mustn't have!! And yes since i have this reliable and sincere help to bring you up ( your Pishi) more often than not i leave you to her while i keep doing the things i love... like visiting social networking sites, little bit of writing, some reading and of course shopping, movies and not only this i have left you with your pishi and father for five full days for a pleasure foreign trip with my colleague!!! I know i sound like a perfect heartless mom...and yes it's not that i have a self absorbed partner who does not take me out for holidays... he does, plans great trips ( only it's him who decides and i pack and follow)..of course there should be nothing objectionable in this....

Okay these were the allegations rather are the allegations you will continue to hear against me...and also some toppings like i hardly do any household chores and have enough time for myself and i really can't blame anyone for infusing these in your heart. Now what do i have for defence and whether i really do need any or as if i am loaded with guilt. Well... Ninni.. i do not get along with a lot of persons. By the time you grow up you'd discover all these about me...never got along with your grandma ( my mother) since i was a child, not much with my brother ( as he puts it i am bearable for a maximum period of 48 hours!!!) and now do not get along with your father and yes with your make-believe pishi. It's not that i dislike any of them nor i think they dislike me much...just that i am impossible sometimes!! And i wonder if you and me would share the same fate... Anyways since your birth leaving the initial turbulent period... i settled in my job leaving you in the hands of my domestic help and i believe she looked after you very well and loved you with her heart. A slum dweller, she would clean and wash in other houses but she looked after you, dressed and bathed you, dressed you in every new frock i got for you and matching hair accessories . She'd take you to the flock of maids gossipping as she'd wait for me to come home from work  and hand you to me when your feet began shaking excitedly as you could spot me approaching!! Believe me she seemed an angel to me, though she took numerous leaves and ultimately we had your pishi to settle down with us. After initial tumultuous period you adjusted with your pishi and having a full time help life was excessively easy for me.

I went for transfers and stayed at different places and she was and still is an indispensable help. And on my part i know nobody may vouch for me but i need to tell you that i did all i could to make her life comfortable and she became one of us... though it became so hard to digest at times. Soon you also knew pishi is an utmost necessity in our lives and you share a strong bond with her. It was not because of my absent mindedness rather because of her love for you that you have learned to love and respect her and trust her with all your needs. If i went out for a day of shopping or movies leaving you at home or school...it was always with a feel of guilt i returned home and i believe it would be the same for any mother. I remember sometimes i'd spend the day outside when i have night shifts and yet would never go office directly rather come home and have a look at you once!! I might sound outrageously defensive...anyways while at infant stage all mothers prepared those boiled and mashed food with different recipes..i did try once or twice but since you were such a fussy eater...lost interest in few days. And then i saw all moms fuss about school and studies...i stayed behind with my laid back ( might be mistaken for arrogance) attitude. Most moms complain about lack of time.. work, kitchen, toddler but most of the times i find enough time to read, write though i'd love more really...and almost stopped entering into kitchen barring trying something new.

Wanderlust or whatever...i decided on this trip without you. You have stayed without me for two months as i went for training and i know it was a very hard time for both of us...and yet i took this plunge... I knew what i was doing wasn't very right but who wanted to be right always and hence the first trip outside country. Not that i enjoyed extremely without you specially those places meant for children..and sometimes i also wondered what i was doing there without you. That was a minor mutiny, an assertion and i loved it more than the trip. Anyways that was a matter of five days and i was back armed with a lot of guilt and allegations from all.

I really do not know if my efforts as a mother falls short of what should be...and i am really this independent woman who moves around leaving you to maid... no Ninni i know you will realise or you already know that you have one gem of a mother! Ma is someone you take for granted, the first name you call when you wake up, the first person you look for in house and this is the most obvious thing. This makes me happy and content and with the apprehension that my activities never blow this up and this remains as obvious as ever... at least as long as it lasts. All said and done i just know you have always won me over with your innocence and this undemanding love which makes one learn only to give....and i know from the mother you were born from i'd be the person who would win you over with her love and the woman she is.

Lots of love

Yours Ma

Dear Ninni

Dear Ninni

You are growing up...beautifully, slowly and before i know one day i will have this beautiful woman staring at me!!  I had only a faint idea how mothers feel and think before you and yes only after your entry into our lives i vaguely began to feel what it was about.

So what do i actually have to tell this growing young woman... not much really..you will discover all the magics and tricks of life, all by yourself and since, let me say this ,not a believer of any beliefs or rules you will never be loaded with my thoughts, so in a word you will be baggage free at least from my side. So i will go candid with you , one thing i need to tell you Ninni i am a non believer as in believing in God or any supernatural power neither i am religious. Having said that i need to tell you as well, i have grown up in a family where pujas were performed every single day and i have been part of the ritual and honestly i am not against any such thing rather love all the festivity. But i do not see any need to believe...that might sound downright audacious arrogant..but it is simple actually, i feel i do not need to believe in anything supernatural, believe in myself and believe in doing good. But i am not in a war, a simple human with all my weaknesses so there is no ego about it, i can join my hands before God and close my eyes yet actually not believe. As you grow up you may find this strange, so just a bit of explanation from my side..i try to be good and do good but then good is also a relative thing where you define your own parameters.

Next.. expectations..i would still like to say i don,t expect much but then as you are growing up, i have automatically started taking pride in your achievements. Hope it sticks to having that pleasure seeing you achieve and not feel that pressure, another form of peer pressure and start resenting if you do not in any instance. But somehow this confidence is there i would always see you as a happy, contented, successful woman. It is very difficult Ninni to detach yourself from the life of someone who took shape bit by bit inside you. I guess as much as we would like to be involved in your lives, at one point we have to let go and i hope i can do it at the right time and yet be there for you always , like my parents have been with me.

Love...yes i,d like to see you in love, believe in love, take your own decisions in love, write secret poems, wipe your tears in solitude...what kind of mother am i !! But there are some things in life where you have to fall and then find your own way to strike back again and i only wish to be there for you.But then this generation as i call it , the laptop, i pad, smart phone generation would you ever feel the pangs of love in teenage, nurse a wounded heart, listen to love songs or secretly admire someone...i have doubts. things are very fast ( of course in comparison) and there is hardly any time to ponder as you move in to next..but that,s  how life,s going to be fast, unforgiving, hard and you would do your best to be at par.Men are good to be with Ninni and i hope you meet the right men...yes men as ' right' might have different meaning in different stages of life.

Your father terms 'What,s in it for me' generation..indeed. Yet i would like to see you achieving, working, brave , independent..trying to change the world in a way i could not....So many things going wrong in the society we live, wouldn,t you attempt to change..at least stand your ground and stand to what you feel right.

All these are expecting too much my be...but that,s how i,d like you to be...bright, bold, happy as you are now..well may be not so bold, as you hide your face in mama,s lap as someone asks you about your new school...but this gives this proud ' mama' feeling i know all mothers have.All said and done you do not have the most perfect, fussy, caring mother in the world...one truth you would discover soon...but you have a loving mother, waiting to learn as much from you, see the world again through your eyes and whose world is filled by your presence, where you breathe life into her existence, shield her from all storms.

So much to tell you.

Love

Yours Ma

Few days apart....

Dear Ninni

Of late I've been worrying...worrying a lot...how to leave you...leave you for a while. We have been around many places all these four years but the greatest thing about it was we stuck together... you and me. Now as you are growing up... you have ' friends' at school ( though they change everyday), you are close to your Baba, fond of your Dadu/Titu, love your Pishi and the best part you will have all these people around you. Cliched as it may sound and perhaps you can understand it years later that the nine month bond through all the fluids and veins....the bond is like a cover a mom wraps around herself, a new life one begins to live. Ninni after your birth... like every mother I am so used to having you around me, yes I would pine for breaks... ( read, write, malls ,movies, friends, husband)...but this is just the most normal, natural thing...go to bed with a tiny warm bundle, gradually a  toddler practicing her kicks and get used to it as the skin to your body.

Now that I will be going for approximately two months...and I have been explaining to you the fact since last three months... I don't know how much you realise. I may not be the one who had always been around you since I joined work when you were about five months. But  as I said this bond is nurtured through all the uterus fluids and complicated veins and mothers wear it like a skin... yes the most practical ones as well. Without you I also feel how do i say... skin less...barren. But would you be all right... you would be I know...you have been through many changes in this little life span of yours and you would have all these persons who love you a lot.

Take care Ninni... you know mothers are always near.. like a shield covering you, protecting you, loving you...and I would be only a few hundred kilometres away. I know this explanation is more for myself than for you. Just want you to be happy, feel loved and blessed....and being away from you does not take you away from me...my soul, essence and presence may be not physically but would bind you always ....courtesy the bond we shared for nine months a few years back....

Be happy.... ma will be back soon. Just office training and I am not going for war really.

Bye
Yours Ma

P.S. Feel me near you when you wish to kick your legs around at night....and for a few days learn not to utter Ma to itch you at mid night....

One more birthday....

Dear Ninni

Ahhh....it,s over..your fourth birthday. We had fun..lots of it.

A day prior we sent a cake to your school ( your birthday being on Saturday we celebrated a day ahead in school), sorry we did not click a pic of it ( read your father did not). A dry tutti fruity cake as instructed by your teachers, and i was more excited about the fluorescent brasso frock and the matching floral clip i got for you. As it was, morning i was in the office also i had the car with me so you went with your Pishi by rickshaw and your Baba followed after much fuss with a large cake ( don,t know why he ordered a ' 2 kilos' cake for kids in my absence) as it was raining and both of you just hate getting wet.

Actually we did not understand how things were in school and was it really a nice idea to send a cake for your birthday. Anyway we picked you up from school (a thing we hardly do together) and went off to Ambience mall , basically we wanted to look for some furniture for our living room and also let you play in the game zone. The idea of leaving you alone in the game zone along with our cell number did not work at all and within minutes we left we got a call from the attendant you have begun howling. Rest of the time we spent in the game parlour...and err... i just get the feeling what a waste of money... and i know you won,t agree with me but i feel awful dishing out hard earned money for absolutely nothing and that too it,s non refundable...nothing less than loot but who is listening to me with onion, potato prices rocketing sky high..and money just flies out of purse into nowhere. Really when i think of money and how to curtail expenses... i,m absolutely clueless... yes i know like all women i do indulge in excessive shopping which just feels so right...
But this is your fourth birthday post so i,ll leave my worries elsewhere for a while.

In Ambience Mall

Your birthday morning we began with some fight before we went to attend your PTM in school , bickering over some petty issue...and i want to tell you whether this is the right time or not i am not sure.. we do fight very often, over all issues under the sun... parenting being one of the primary ones as of now, from there we take on to each other,s upbringing, parents, home, family, tastes... sometimes issues would be a huge debate between an ox and a bull, about my 'on paper' principles and so many things. Your father and all people who love tells me repeatedly not to fight in front of you.. but this keeps happening. So Ninni, your Ma will confess we are not an ideal romantic couple or doting parents you will set your eyes on...we argue at every thing we can get our hands at... and being 'middle classy ' there isn,t much public display of affection ( of whatever affection we have!!) and may be that is why you have learnt to take ' sides' , mostly my side against your Baba and take full advantage of our squabbles.

While we were attending PTM listening to your teacher complaining about you making fuss and wail...

Credit to Pishi for a home cooked lunch while i was out arranging for the party ( including visit to the parlour)

Something about your growing up... you are growing up to be an extremely gizmo friendly person... the i pad mini we had to get  you and loads of you tube videos you watch of some Tutitu, Dora and host of other cartoons....and now we are tearing our hair out as internet usage has been exceeded way past the limit and the huge bill staring at us... finally we are going to change the plan. There is my perennial dilemma whether we are indulging you too much...but as my Baba always said and i myself believed in too... banning things which others have easy access to isn,t going to help.Till now we could not get you interested in reading, i know you are too little and it is not that you do not like books but other gizmos attract you too much...let us wait and see.. and perhaps a reminder for me to put more books in and around you... You are quite comfortable in school though we have regular complaints that you cry and make fuss at the drop of a hat so much that even teachers are scared to say anything to you!! Anyway that is their problem for me if you wake up, have your bath and go to school without a fuss...is a big achievement and while you chatter all the way as we drive back from school.. i am happy. We love to hear about your friends in school who incidentally change every alternative day!! Few days you were gushing about some ' Jhanvi', then came Anusha,s turn who would happily grab your lunch, from the last week it was ' Ananya Tushi' ( No idea what Tushi  actually is)... your bosom chum..both of you waving at each other madly, only yesterday ' Ananya Tushi' was being dismissed and Shubham became your best friend and another day Paranjay became your friend as you had slipped and fell in the class and everyone laughed and Mr Paranjay came to your rescue!! Though you never mentioned him again....

Also i love the excuses you give for not having fruits in school... Harpriya said ' bohot jyaada hain' so i did not have!! Another day.. Shubham ne itna shor machaya...so i could not have!!! Wonderful. One thing i will admit...i have a feeling you are not going to trouble me much in your normal academics and i am happy with that and without claiming to be ' different' i would like to say that my expectations aren,t sky high...watching you grow up and have fun is a delightful thing for me. We enjoy our moments with you, listening to your chatters.... if i say ' who was it  who didn't look at your ma,m in the eyes and always looked idhar-udhar... Avni?' and you quip in immediately ' Nahi nahi Soumya... who always look upar neeche when ma,m asks her something' raising your head from you tube..Yes Hindi rules at home , though i try to speak Bengali you manage to distract me and i clip into Hindi again... only when we go to Guwahati...i can get to hear you speak in Bengali.

Couldn,t have enough of the pink frock......

Coming to your birthday party... we kept it very simple ( You know ' firends-and-family' kind as celebrities put!!!)... but your pink frock , balloons , Dora cake and  two bullies around i think you did enjoy and so did we....i enjoyed my excuse to indulge myself at the parlour for a few hours, your father rushed around getting C R Park Kolkata Biryani amidst rain...

So our four years together have been exciting, confusing, vexing and gave an entirely different perspective to our lives. I remember your father told me the day before you were born, ' Our lives would change from tomorrow and all our priorities would be decided by this one inside you'.... I didn,t understand then as much as i do now...and yes in this routine life.. your school, our jobs.... all routine tasks...you are our constant source of happiness and growing up with you is something we cherish and love.

Love
Yours Ma

The 'New's in our life....

Dear Ninni

I don,t know if you are going to understand what i mean or may be if you ever do  you are going to like it.. Just like that some time will be in life where you will be absolutely clueless as to where life is heading.. and if you are really liking wherever it is heading to..

I attended your school orientation programme and was pleased to see the children performing , almost liked your principal,s speech.. and kept wondering would you grow up to be a ' confident' human being from the school as they promised..since i went after my night duty and was a bit drowsy and also my inherent absent mindedness..my thoughts drifted.. This world is very tough Ninni.. no one lets you an inch of space until you fight and get a centimeter of your own. Starting from the road where i am almost an eight month old driver now..where vehicles overtake me from left and right, fellow colleagues term me a ' slow driver' and what i realise no one's going to let you an inch.. on the road, at work and so true of life. Recently we have shifted to Gurgaon from the office quarters we had in Delhi and while i cross the toll gates to Delhi.. you know if one of the toll gates was dysfunctional and by luck  i would get stuck in the wrong queue.. nobody would let you a bit of space knowing very well without them giving way there is absolutely no place to go..So you look at the drivers in the right queue with a pleading helpless look and crawl inch by inch...

Talking of drivers...big car owners or rightly called SUV owners have arrogance recklessness embedded in their veins, similarly cab drivers show same mentality.. and i can classify bus and truck drivers in another head and yes the omnipresent auto drivers always appearing out of nowhere and taking a turn right in front of you.. But you know the ' road' ..the fun part of road is there is space just enough for everyone.. from the dead slow tempos, to the devilish giant buses, from the sleek SUV,s to bicycles and autos..all have their place in the road.. and as i watch the suave cars driving desperately behind bike in one side and auto in the other, honking impatiently breathing down their spine..making their way ahead.. and the funny part auto,bike even bicycle no one,s willing to give up!! Everyone,s in a dead hurry, honking, overtaking, driving zig zag ..and of course there are the ones like me confused , fumbling few but they do exist!!

Well i didn,t intend to write about ' road' and my new explorations..just that i have discovered this part of road a bit late in my life since i started driving only since last year. Coming back to what i intended to tell you, as i was watching your school orientation programme and switched off to a bit ' philosophical' mode .. despite all the promises and good words you all would grow up to be tough human beings tougher than the ones today and you would learn to hold on to your space all right and at the same time know not to give in.. not to give anybody a bit of space... Professionally also when i switch to my 'philosophical' mode i simply wonder about the fierce selfishness clouding the workplace, we work together but stay almost friendless, willing to go any length to get the best deal and all these in a public sector environment!! Personally i find myself  having you and your father as family, parents back there in home town and yet i wonder how come i have become so friendless in life.. where have all the friends vanished to.. The hosts of ' friends' from schools and colleges and sometimes friends at work place.. once the time is over.. you are left with memories.. and then the curtain falls gradually and memories fade..
You know my junior colleague with whom i used to spend hours in Barapani last year..i do remember the times with her often and i believe she does to , but the phone calls become shorter with one year coming to close..and memories get far away. The present i guess is all powerful and soaks in past bit by bit...Now we are here in a new locality ( Gurgaon) and you beginning a proper school and soon your father would be away for weeks. I do recall my evenings in Barapani  from my twelfth floor apartment...

After a long wait, we shifted to what we can call our ' own' house, with a bit of ' space' inside unlike the house you spent your beginning years in Delhi. The society has a ' children park' along with lots of urbane suave moms i hesitate to strike up conversations with, a basement parking where i struggled the first month to park my car delicately between the pillars leaving just the right amount of space for the next door car. The twelfth floor balcony gives you insight to many of the apartments, sometimes a close view of sky..But guess can do nothing about the friendless thing...Anyway we are happy your new school has taken off and i see a new you emerging slowly.. new friends, new dreams and may be a dream we would live again  through you..our school and college days.

Just scribbled some lines trying to assemble my thoughts...

Lots of love
Yours Ma

School.. The beginning..

 

Our first visit to the zoo

Dear Ninni

Winters are just on the doorsteps..some warm clothes taken out, most of the times we remain confused what to wear, if the cloths are a bit too warm braving the scorching sun during noon or the chill of the evenings causing a slight shiver..which indicates normal cloths are not just enough. Fog, smog.. Delhi sky remains veiled most of the times but a pleasant feeling freed of extremities of the Delhi weather.

So one fine day we decided to visit the zoo. Actually we have been planning since many days but our work schedules, weather, other commitments did not allow. Your grandparents are here and thanks to your father's over enthusiasm when they are here..do i sound cynical..let me.. you will be discovering my cynicism and eccentricities gradually and may be find them irksome...but.. no i won't say thats how i am..i will try to be better..anyways we set for zoo one early sunday morning.

We are always late for everything, reach everywhere just about when entry gates are about to close, or the movie is past 5-10 minutes, or the shows are over, mall entry is closed but that day somehow we reached early when the crowd has not yet built up..and as your grandma remarked even the animals were not up from their slumber!! A lovely morning and we started with white ducks, then made our way for the White tiger. You know in Guwahati I've been to the zoo many times in childhood but with you it is like looking through your eyes again and hence the thrill and me and your father getting more excited than you!! With you it is a backward journey be it enjoying Durga  Puja, Deepawali, visit to the park and now zoo..like we are going back in time and finding those lost joys....

The tigers... one lazing in the sun, other too seemed extremely lazy drinking water near the ditch, you know it hurt seeing them forced out of their habitat and left idle here, nothing to do!!  One was kept confined in a cage like area and it was moving ferociously inside..out of its abode, out of its instinct, out of prey..may be it did not yet succumb to the environment thrust upon it...

Next was reptile house, a disappointment i must day barring a few pythons, most of the cages are empty,clay models of turtles and snakes... wonder where all the species have vanished! Yes i loved the white swans lazing about near a pond and a strange big bird called ' emu' resembling ostrich. Then we could see the ' sloth  bear' dark and all bear like..talk of bear hugs.!! And we absolutely loved the two giraffes loitering in the woods.. as your grandma remarked they seemed the most amicable  may be because of the fact that they had a partner or rather a compatible partner was my analysis!! Or may be as the day progressed the animals were waking up and caught up with the day.. and most of them were nocturnal as well. We had passed by a crocodile which your grandma swore was made of plastic, though your father and grandpa argued for the contrary, i was in doldrums as well doubting if the crocodile was real. And to dispense with all the doubts it opened its eye body position remaining same!! We remembered one famous line by Tagore from his story wherein one character  believed to be dead by all had to commit suicide to prove that she was not a witch and indeed she had been alive!!

Ah.. now all of us were beginning to get exhausted and you changing from one shoulder to another, Choco Bars, Biscuits...but no you won't walk. So some coffee and we had plans to skip the ' lion, elephants' part and moved in to the bird cages. Peacocks, pheasants, parrots ( other names i cannot remember)  all were chirping, chattering fun to watch. A ferocious cheetah banging on the cages...freedom Ninni is so sought after may be you realise it only after losing it, a lonely chimpanzee snuggled at the top of a cage with its back to us, it never showed its face once, another lonely rhino looked totally lost in the huge space meant for it.

You know while i went as a child i remember the ' fun' part which was getting tepid as i grew up, but this time though the loneliness of the animals, their lack of freedom and natural habitat was a sore sight but i won't complain...they the zoo authorities had put in effort after these animals so that they thrive and breed  and thats how we can see them.

Last was the algae lake with lots of cranes and other migratory birds, that was very lively as no one was caged there. The birds were catching fish from the pond, protecting their eggs and chics.. you know some of these birds come from far away countries unable to bear the cold there..strange how they find their way thousands of miles across the border and return home once winter is over

Panchi Nadiya pawan ke jhoke..koi sarhad na inhe roke..

It was a fun visit, we had lots of fun with you and as i said it was just like going back in time for us, taking a look at the animals through your eyes, gaping at the size and shapes like seeing them for the first time removing the layers of cliches already embedded deep in brain, just looking at things without preconceived ideas. I was telling you father.. i cannot find a proper children story to tell you, Cindrella, Snow Ehite were so cliched  with mother dying father getting a step mom!! He told me why not Panchatantra tales, i tried to tell him those fables we grew up with.. now while i tell you sound irrelevant most of the time. I gave example of the fox and grapes story.. hungry fox trying to have grapes but not being able..i feel sad for the fox!! Yes your father looked at me with unbelievable eyes trying hard not to laugh. I tried to reason, we grew up with these tales they are printed in our memory but when i begin to tell you the cliches become so conspicuous....

So where do i find non cliched things for you as i let you gobble up super cliched episodes of doraemon and chota bheem while i laze about in blogs and facebook !!  Anyways this post was about our visit to the zoo and the fun we had and the pics we clicked. Hope you love it when you read it.

Love
Yours Ma

Emu

The Ferocious One

Growing up in Baba,s shoulders!!

In Happy times.. with your grandma

White Pheasant

Migratory Birds...

We visited Purana Quila as well

The Team

Thammu  Dadu and you