Being Chandler Bing!

Mathew Perry's passing away was not unusual considering the lives celebrities live. But it was Chandler Bing, nah he wasn't my favourite in the show and I don't think he was a favourite of many out of the six . He was the most ordinary, most average, least eccentricities, most awkward! Yet his passing away created an uproar...nah it isn't social media gimmick!

Chandler Bing was a part of our lives since decades. Ordinary, awkward, shy...the fact that he is no more has created such a vaccum of the friend, who's always there, the ordinary friend who listens, the introvert friend who's there to fall back to. I think that has taken the world by storm. His absence, dug out a big vaccum, which was under wraps by his presence. Nobody's favourite, everyone's taken for granted buddy...but his absence suddenly showed us what he meant to us! The show is off the air decades now, but for most of us for some unplugged laughter, for some mood upliftment, any season any episode just led one to a riot of laughter and took us off from our lives.

I was thinking what was about the show, what was about Mathew Perry...what set it apart. I read someone's comment 'Friends' was actually a show which made being awkward, being bullied, having complexes, jealousies, failures...cool. The things we learn to keep under wraps, our embarrassment, our failures, losing friend to someone...the characters actually dealt with that without inhibitions. It was like a revelation that people in that chic city actually lived through the pain, frustration we do. The six characters had their eccentricities and yes I watched it for fun and laughs with occasional romance or a few emotional moments thrown in, though over the years wondered why there wasn't any more show like this, at least none for me. Matthew Parry's passing away pointed finger at an emotional dungeon created by his absence. The ordinary, the average, the unheard, the insignificant...he was just that... and isn't that many of us.... Many of us not so flamboyant ones aren't we all Chandler Bings with our complexes, dreams to get into the cool club, complications with parents, fear of being not accepted, trauma of being bullied ! Chandler told our story subtly which we hardly realised. We loved cute Rachael, finicky Monica, crazy Phoebe, nerdy Ross, dunce Joey but Chandler...he was so us...just one of us.

I am not a Mathew Parry fan to write about him. But I've watched Friends, all seasons, all episodes ( might have missed a few because I watched on Tv and not OTT) multiple times and each time found something new to laugh about! I had laughed unplugged, adored Joey, Ross, admired Rachael, Monica but it was the actor's passing away made me feel how like all I also could not notice the ordinary. Someone who's there always to laugh heartily, admire, listen how we miss such a person often in life. Is it that we have many Chandler Bings in our lives yet we do not know them or realise their worth after their absence! I don't know really! His absence as if is a call for us...let us pause and listen...to the ones who only suppress, who are there for us...let us be there for them!

Chandler Bing celebrated ordinariness, awkwardness, embraced his fallacies, was a friend, the friend we all wish to have and yet fail to be his when needed. He was also the lover, the husband nobody could think of! Yeah it's only a show, but a show about not our filmy heroes, a show about struggling people emotionally, financially, a show about emotions, sentiments under the beautiful wrap of laughter and fun. Chandler Bing is only a character, but a character like us, fears, frustrations, being ordinary, being insignificant , unable to open up...he made being average real cool. That's why like many I'm reeling under a vaccum wave, of missing the ordinary, insignificant but a friend to fall back to.

Let us not miss the Chandler Bings in our lives! They might just be there and we didn't notice, they might be in pain and we are unable to fathom! Let's celebrate being ordinary, being unpopular, being alone in a group...let's celebrate being introvert and let's try to lend our heart to all the Chandler Bing s around! Like Joey staring wistfully at the vacant recliner by his side...the friend we love, we will always love!

RIP